Narrator: "...and now here they are! The most daredevil group of daffy drivers to ever whirl their wheels in the WACKY RACES. Competing for the title of worlds wackiest racer. The cars are approaching the starting line. First, is the Turbo Terrific driven by Peter Perfect. Next is Rufus Ruffcut and Sawtooth in the Buzzwagon. Maneuvering for position is the Army Surplus Special. Right behind is the Ant Hill Mob in their Bullet Proof Bomb. Then there's ingenious inventor Pat Pending in his Convert-A-Car. Oh! Here's the lovely Penelope Pitstop, the glamour gal of the gas pedal. Next we have the Bouldermobile with the Slag Brothers, Rock & Gravel. Lurching along is the Creepy Coupe with the Gruesome Twosome, and right on their tail is the Red Max. And there's the Arkansas Chug-A-Bug with Luke & Blubber Bear. Sneaking along last is that Mean Machine with those double dealing do-badders Dick Dastardly and his sidekick, Muttley."
Dick Dastardly: "Drat. And double drat!"